Penton: Sports mascots are big business
By Bruce Penton
Sports fans may consider team mascots to be: a) entertaining; b) annoying; c) hilarious; d) adding to the game experience. Whatever your view, their existence in sports today is no laughing matter. Mascots are big business.
It’s almost mandated that every professional sports team must have a mascot to fire up the fans. Their efforts help to get the “Go Team Go” chants going, to help start the wave around the seating area, to tussle some youngster’s hair so Mom and Dad can get a picture, and in some cases, bang a drum so loudly that some fans go home with a headache.
There are endless mascot stories, but my favourite is when Harvey the Hound, the Calgary Flames’ mascot, got too close to the Edmonton Oilers bench in a 2003 game at the Saddledome and had his tongue ripped out by Oilers’ assistant coach Craig MacTavish, who then waved the piece of red felt in the air before tossing it into the crowd behind him. No penalty was called by the officials, who didn’t even give him a tongue-lashing.
As mentioned earlier, sports mascots are big business. The person who answers to Gritty, the smiling, scary, big-eyed, orange Philadelphia Flyers monster, recently signed a contract that pays him/her an annual stipend of $250,000 U.S. Pretty good dough, but not sure how the job description would look on a resumé.
Grey Cup champion Saskatchewan Roughriders recently announced they are on the lookout for a new Gainer the Gopher. While most gophers in Saskatchewan meet their maker from a shotgun blast from an angry farmer, Gainer is the most beloved critter in the Wheat Province. “A Rider Fan’s Dream Job,” said radio station CKRM on its website. “Think you can gopher it?” headlined CKOM Radio. Job requirements state that the winning Gainer must be “young, energetic and willing to dress like a football-obsessed rodent.” The team’s online job posting, according to a Canadian Press story, says the Riders are “looking for someone who can dance, hug, give high fives, and also improvise — all while staying in character.”
Canada’s best baseball mascot was Youppi from the Montreal Expos. He was thought to be out of work when the Expos moved to Washington in 2005, but the Canadiens decided to hire Youppi as the NHL team’s first mascot. He remains on the job at the Bell Centre today. Youppi is one of only three mascots with glass-encased displays at the Baseball Hall of Fame in Cooperstown. The San Diego Chicken and the Phillie Phanatic are the others. Youppi remains the only Canadian entry in the Mascot Hall of Fame.
Former Dodgers’ manager Tommy Lasorda had his issues with mascots. He once got into an on-field fight with the Phillie Phanatic, and had Youppi ejected from a game in Montreal after the mascot continuously jumped on the roof of the Dodger dugout.
Meanwhile, you can go online to apply to be the new Gainer. It’s only part-time, but it beats living in a hole in the ground.
Author Paul Myers, whose book on John Candy devotes a full chapter to Candy’s Canadian Football League excursion, in which he, Wayne Gretzky and Bruce McNall bought the Toronto Argonauts: “One wonders how well that part of the comedian’s life translates to American readers who wouldn’t know a Rough Rider from a Roughrider.”
Cathal Kelly of the Globe and Mail, on the popularity of football at the U of Alabama with 17-year-olds across America: “Almost 60,000 of them apply each year to go the University of Alabama, and it isn’t because it has a hot environmental sciences program.”
Super 70s Sports: “Scientists now believe Topps gum from the ’80s will outlast all animal and plant life on the planet.”
A piece of wisdom from the late Lou Holtz, snipped from sportscurmudgeon.com: “Coaching is nothing more than eliminating mistakes before you get fired.”
Cathal Kelly of the Globe and Mail, after an uninspiring Leafs’ effort against Tampa Bay: “After an initial burst of enthusiasm, the only way they could have been worse is if they’d gone back to the dressing room and reappeared in their bathrobes.”
Kelly again, mocking the Fraser Minten for Brandon Carlo trade that also gave the Bruins Toronto’s first-round draft pick: “That they thought (Minten) was disposable explains why the Leafs should hire a responsible adult to be present during all future negotiations.”
Golf great Jack Nicklaus, asked if he liked the TPC Sawgrass course when it opened in 1982: “No, I’ve never been very good at stopping a 5-iron on the hood of a car.”
European pro golfer Darren Clarke: “The 17th at Sawgrass is like waking up at 6:30 in the morning knowing you have root canal work at 3:30.”
Mike Bianchi of the Orlando Sentinel: “The Tampa Bay Buccaneers should not have let franchise legend Mike Evans sign a contract elsewhere. The Buccaneers without Mike Evans is like their pirate ship without its cannons.”
fark.com headline: “Las Vegas Raiders forgot to say ‘no takebacksies' before Maxx Crsoby fails physical and Baltimore nixes trade.”
Care to comment? Email brucepenton2003@yahoo.ca